Week 6 '06

Happy Birthday America! First up, some administrative notes - Commissioner Patty is VERY disappointed in the captains in not handing in the rosters in a timely manner. She has had to place the rosters in a "Dora The Explorer" Folder because it has become a task just like baby-sitting young children. Be warned, the rules will change dramatically next year. Next week there is mandatory captain’s meeting at 6:00 PM. Either the captain or a representative must attend. This is your final chance to hand in your signed rosters. There are some very important equipment issues that need to be addressed as well. You will also be reminded that the games start at 6:45 PM and if your net is not up at that time the home team suffers a first game forfeit. We've slipped up from our on-time performances of the last two seasons and we need to get back on track.

The rains miraculously cleared Wednesday night and the conditions were ideal for another evening of great volleyball and fun. It’s All Good struggled without the Goldbergs and Flanagans. (Condolences go out to the family for the recent loss of their Aunt.) Acting captain Eddie thought 12 beers and 5 waters would keep the squad in line but he was very wrong. It looked like a grammar school class with a substitute teacher. Who would have thought that youths, Will and Adam would be suffering from the long holiday weekend while aging veteran Seal was ready to go. I guess he stayed out of trouble, working on Sudoku puzzles. My how the times have changed. Where was TBG, The Big Ghost?

Crazy Legs Witkowski and Maverick could have been the best two-man team on the beach except for Mazzio and Flaherty’s jinx. The Cassino’s will be missed next week. They’ll be stuck on the dirty beaches of Bermuda while we’re enjoying the white sands of Rockaway. Can someone help Crazy Legs out? Do you bring the parking permits to the bar or do you leave them on the dashboard of your car?

Were the authorities keeping the humans out or the birds in with their new parking lot fence? Our own Cubby completed the Tour de Rockaway over the weekend by biking from the Bay House to Jameson's, finishing with a flourish and a back flip into the outdoor cafe. Cubby's wounds seem to be more and more visible each week. Did that three-way shower between Janet, Eileen and Joe take place this week? Inquiring minds want to know. Eileen, remember it's $20 today and $25 tomorrow. Tommy Kearns began using the rules of 2006 for the first time this week and you could barely tell the difference in his calls. (They were still right on the money.) Kerry Douglass has stalked Jimmy Buffet from row 2 at the Today Show and row 2 (upper deck) at Jones Beach. He has since taken out an Order of Protection. Are the Beach House firemen still checking their hoses at Riis Park? We didn’t see the Brokeback Boys at the bar until very late. The real firemen of Breezy showed up in force and spearheaded the party.

The Cheese Fries loved the cheese fries. Why wouldn’t they? A Night Out missed GW but they forgive her absence and hope all went well at the Five-Star Musical Chair Camp she visited. She missed a great night of ball and a 3-2 win over Simon Says Sea Bar. Joe, Seal and Rocky returned to the scene of their early triumphs in the annual Sugar Bowl tournament but where were Dee-bo, Bird and Billy Moore? Bernie slipped into Breezy undetected unlike his trip in to play ball a few years back when security patrols followed him, questioned him, cuffed him and beat a confession out of him. Kelly got her annual block on Big Richie even though G&S fell 1-4 to Freedhand's.

The Bayview Bashers were happy to see the Federation was missing their “Big Three”, Greg, George and Brian. Kudos to Tom Ford Jr. who persevered despite being gashed in the ankle by some strategically placed granite. Jimmy Mack felt it was a good time to practice, so he practiced getting mad at his teammates. George was on fire, letting out some steam on the volleyball. Sica wanted to alter the traditional practice of shaking hands at the switch of sides, by replacing the handshake with a kiss for Maureen, Mary and Mary. He also wanted to play ten games.

The Rogue Sharks struggled due to excessive alcohol intake since last Wednesday but Cubby reached into his bag of tricks to spark the club. Theresa Hazel’s serve didn’t hurt their cause either. Connolly’s is hot winning 5 again! Too bad it was another forfeit. They better have full attendance next week because the Phisters and the Breens will be on vacation. How many times is Coach John Sica going to review the scouting tape of the Killer Hills this week? What makes him think he can come up with a winning strategy anyway? He’d be better off digging up three very tall men to block and spike during the games. Bayview! Bay-who?

Bayview Bashers celebrate another successful week Also they won at volleyball.

Pier 92 Piranha’s took a game for their second win of the whole season. Tara Vasselman aka Hanna aka Misty May was on the sidelines for the victory but guarded the cooler. The only problem is she emptied it. Otto wishes he could fill Hanna’s shoes. MIP is Vinny Bonanno. Spike it to me one more time. Last Call sends a shout out to the USS Eisenhower, Weapons Division. We’re rooting for you; keep rooting for us. The Mauler ran late as he had to repaint his garage after the big bash but he had help from the Surface Cleaner. Ava Gabor aka Gabriella was out in force; thankfully she chose playing volleyball over modeling her new cruise wear line. Go girl! The BB was missed but he had to finish a three-year bathroom renovation. ("If you have the time, I'll bring the wine.") He may want to rent a bus to transport next week's supplies. Hey Air, McGyver thinks women are the weakest link, not you. You may be next year's co-captain. Team Margarita, you are being voted off of the island.

Its been rumored the Rats have been living under the boardwalk working on their plays all week. Fact is, they have impressed themselves so much they may have to change their name to Grassy’s Muskrats (they're bigger). A good competition was played against One More?, but with the Ward Ladies off on vacation their team just was not the same and fell 0-5. I guess Captain Mike does have something up his sleeve, playing his two A teams in rotation. You're gonna need something stronger then poison when you come up against this cheesy bunch.

Jameson’s Turtles beat the Beach Orphan 4-1 due to captain Greg being on vacation once again. He apparently had a more important game in the Vero Beach Volleyball League (VBVL). Rockaway Dave stepped up to the plate today, leaving his day job as a Greek sailor. Kerry “The Serve” Nash and Danny “I Got It!” Sugrue led the team. If Danny gets any redder he’ll look like Teddy Kennedy on a drive through Chappaquiddick. To all the ball hogs (and you know who you are) stay in your own spot. The Brooklyn Transplants have gotten on a roll lately (4-1). Could it be because another captain, John is playing with Goofy in Florida and Jaime shucked his thumb off instead of shucking the clams Eileen brought over? And the worst part – they didn’t get to drink the martinis that were chilling on the side. Cub reporter Slim Spitty was rumored to be retired, possibly because of excessive inside jokes. Perhaps the future Hot Tub Bill will take his place.

The Sugar Bowl had great food, people and ambience.

There are many discrepancies among the RBVL elders as to when the league began. One honored and true member of the RBVL and the FDNY thinks it all began in 1989 when a couple of neighbors were looking for something different to do on a summer night. Every party was at the Rain Tower with pizzas from downstairs. (Life was simpler then.) We want to hear from the other elders. Among the original seven teams were the Raintower, the Wades, and the Beach House. Do you remember the rest of the original crew?

The Rockaway residents of the RBVL made like Magellan after the games and set out to explore brave new worlds Wednesday night. They discovered the mysteries and wonders of a different continent, Breezy Point when they visited the Sugar Bowl after the weekly volleyball matches. The crowd was terrific and once again members were treated to a fine night of refreshments and entertainment, including an outdoor volleyball court with lights.

Don’t forget that next week’s party is RBVL Beach Night at Riis Park. A DJ will be brought out and one VB court will be lit up for night play. After the games, you only have to return your net and move closer to the DJ, who will set up near the main information board by the steps. Remember it is your job to be creative and bring the drinks (which you do every week) and food of your choice. (TBG, technically a Slim Jim is not food per the FDA.) Outdo your neighbor; outdo the league. What better way to spend a summer night than with all of our RBVL members, even those who are too young to join us on our weekly pub-crawl. Bring a sweatshirt in case the night air cools off and prepare to stay well into the night. This is also the night of our "sort of annual" competition to wear an old or original league uniform shirt. Let's see if someone can defeat Steve Gifford, who usually wins this contest with a classic outfit.

Continue to check the bulletin board for the layout of the week and don't hesitate to ask questions. Also, listen for the Human PA System, Bugsy who will be barking out instructions to help us along. As always, if you need assistance before Wednesday, please call Patty Moule at 917-566-2809. (Be sure to call between 10 AM and 9 PM.) Or just check our website at www.rbvl.com. You'll find the answers to most of your questions there, not to mention pretty pictures and funny stories. See you on the beach!