Position Week

On Wednesday, leading up to Saturdays playoffs, was position week. The most meaningful match of the night took place in the Blue Division as “It’s All Good” faced off against co-division leader, “The Irish Circle, Circling Sharks”, who were both tied for first going in. Bugsy played Captain Quint as It’s All Good harpooned the Sharks, 5-0 in the marquee match up of Position Week. “It’s All Good” will try to ride the momentum of Wednesday’s match to avoid their annual playoff choke, and finally wear the championship sweatshirts.

In The Red Division, Coppersmiths overpowered Just Healy’s leaving no doubt who the best team in the league is. More on that below.

As you look at the standings, you can probably guess the odds for each division without going to Las Vegas. However after much careful analysis the staff of the Wave has formulated its predictions for the playoffs, and some of the results might surprise you! In the hotly contested Blue Division, our prognosticators foresee the movie Jaws adding another sequel, despite Wednesday’s beating. Look for the Sharks in the upset. In the White Division, Kerry Hills will be devastated, but not until next year when they play against their peers. The Hills will win easily, losing only one game total on Saturday. For the Red Division there will be a surprise champion, and the “Charmed Sisters” will all be united as they have their upsets in common.

If there was any doubt in anyone’s mind as to who would be entering the playoffs as the one seed, Coppersmiths erased it in the feature match up in the red division - Coppersmith’s broke Bobby the Big Toe and Healy’s by a 4 to 1 margin. Healy’s claims they are trying to lull Coppersmith’s to sleep, the only problem is that Healy’s has been sleeping all season. For those who need it, especially The Big Toe and Marie, there will be an anger management councelor on the beach Saturday for group or one-on-one session? Special agent O’Malley’s game seems to have gone way undercover, maybe he left it in Cape Cod all summer long with Healy’s other excuse! He was seen in Jameson’s referring to himself as an International Man Of Mystery????????? As for Richie Whelan, Coppersmith’s alleged Superman, he has not been the same since he was tattooed by a special delivery ball from Mark the Malibu Guy Aiken. Whelan was heard screaming “The Plane The Plane boss” after being tattooed. Mark Gentile put in his vote for most improved league player for Richie Whelan … much debate in Jameson’s has ensued as to whether you can be most improved and most valuable at the same time – Kevin O’Malley, and of course Clair’s Scotty so Hottie were heavy contenders in the conversation … as Malibu guy Aiken offered some room for consideration in the Most Improved Category … after all, he does own Richie … but then again Judy owns Mark. Will Coppersmith’s get it done Saturday? Will Craig 4 and a half kids Carey come with the same fire in his belly that he brought to position week … making the ladies of Healey’s chase balls down the beach? Will Jack Bradley and Marie play together one last time this summer? Can the new “Three’s Company’s team of the Gatorade Sisters + Scotty get it done on Saturday?? Show up and find out? If not just check out their new digs on 130^th!!!!! P.S. – Healy’s gives a big “Thank God for Dancer” this week, without him it would have been a complete blow out. Joe McManus would like to know when Dancer will let him hit again … maybe Saturday – same Bat time, same Bat channel?!?

The Bikini Bottom All Stars quietly have beaten the number 2&3 teams in the past three weeks. What could be next? We’ll see Saturday. The All Stars beat Abbracciamento’s 3-2, behind some questionable coaching decisions by coach Rocky. What was he thinking by benching Joe and Trish for the first two games? Jack McManus showed up for the third week of the season, making him playoff eligible. Meanwhile Coach Sica signed Patty Melt’s latest edition to a three year deal for the 2019-2021 seasons.

In the White Division, The Odd Couples jumped into the playoffs with a 5-0 victory (unfortunately, by forfeit) while One Win fell just short with a 2-3 loss. At the top of the division the Fisheads edged the Beach House 3-2. Combined with the 1-4 loss by Fillmore Insurance it was enough to catapult the Rugby gang into second place based on their better head to head record against Fillmore during the season. Kerry Hills continued to roll despite playing without their MVP Trish the Dish, 4-1. She was listed as probable for Saturday.

The Blue Division featured the match of the day between two teams tied for first place. It also featured the biggest letdown of the year when It's All Good trounced the Circling Sharks 5-0. The match turned in the first game with the Sharks leading 9-4. After a strategic timeout by coach Bugsy, Seal "the Real Deal" Moore took over and single-handedly carried his squad to a 11-9 comeback win. The Sharks' spirit was broken and the rest of the games were not even close. Sheila and Mary Beth would not go in the water because of the Great White Shark and they were happy to watch from the sidelines. After the match there was icy tension in the air between the players, who had all been long time friends up to this point. In fact, the music from West Side Story could be heard as the Rockaway version of the Sharks and Jets faced off with coolers at 20 paces. On Saturday the final chapter will be written in this tale and don't be surprised if the results are different. (Also, don't be surprised if they both lose and the Beach Club sneaks in again as champion.)

In the Red Division, Jameson's nosed out Connolly's for 5th place with a 3-2 win and the advantage in a tie-breaker. You can't get any closer than that! Jameson’s is looking for someone to free Buck’s feet from the cement they are stuck in. Miracles do happen, the miners in PA were rescued and so too can Buck’s imprisoned feet. Keith Green fresh off one of the best weddings in recent memory brought an amazing amount of energy to the table. TC was everywhere and yet nowhere at times during the grueling affair. Kelly was sending balls right over the net on 2. Later in Jameson’s she was heard saying, “If Aiken could hit I would set him.” Jameson’s plans to pretty much eat at Abbracciamento's on Saturday for a late breakfast, oh yeah they will be coming in the front door to be seated! I can hear Abbracciamento's knees creaking now, (from old age I mean.) While we are on the subject of Jameson’s … an important note for the season – Mrs. Aiken and Mrs. Butler will be going into the playoffs as a five seed while Mr. Aiken and Mr. Butler will be entering play on Saturday as a six seed. Bragging rights to the ladies for the rest of the summer! P.S. from Easy Going Sully to fellow Ma Hoosh Ka and Boat owner “Teddy Wacky Wednesday” I will meet you in the schoolyard to rearrange your record spinning face!