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RBVL Action Heats Up              By Rocky D.               6/24/11

Last Call may not be first in the standings but they are first in this story.  And isn’t that more important anyway?  Last Call players, be cautious; the Beer Boy’s cooler has athlete’s mouth virus.  Drink at your own risk.  Zsa Zsa dissected the opposition like a science teacher in a college lab as she served the team to victory.  Kate the Great needs to watch out for the so called holes.  Maybe she needs a lesson from the Brooklyn boys who wear their sneakers (and black socks) on the court.  MacGyver has the communication diva surpassing all expectations in the RBVL.  Their attention to detail is extra anal.  Be careful; your captain is burning the score card.  There was a tropical storm in Far Rockaway and a tornado watch in South Jersey heading to New York.   Whatever it produced barometrically, Riis Park had The Perfect Calm.  As Bob Dylan said, “You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.”  Sands Point Physical Therapy defeated The Notorious Dig 4-1 after losing the first game.  Then Tom Touhey showed up for games two through five which were all victories.  Most say it was coincidental.  Jake and Chris Reilly and Josh provided the offensive punch.  Brendan is off to serving school at the unanimous request of the team.  Even the ref voted to send him.

You may notice less young refs next week on the 29th of June because they will be in Atlanta, Georgia playing in the GEVA National Volleyball Championships.  Aviator U-13 is representing the Rockaway’s and RBVL at the event.  The league will also miss some veteran players as well as they proudly accompany and coach the young ladies.  Good Luck and enjoy this great experience.  This comes right behind RBVL player (and our President’s son) Alex Moule taking a trip to the Nationals where he represented Xaverian High School on the CHSAA All Star team.  This is a small part of the RBVL future, and it is a very bright one.  Casino Tow lost 3-2 to Dig This but Rocky’s three gals (Think Charlie’s Angels redux) led by Lauren, Sarah and Brianne carried the team to two important victories.  The White Horse Tavern Beach Posse is glad to be back for a second season in a new division in spite of two players going on the DL early in the season (Maura and Joe) and losing Jon to another team.  (Not that team, the one in the volleyball league.)  There were some great volleys with the Bungalow Baranhas and that’s what it’s all about.


Alison suggests that TBG stop talking about his accidental five wins many weeks ago.  The Boosh is back and not very Booshful about it either.  The Beach Orphans send a shout out to Bridget Lunney, who came out on her birthday to celebrate three losses.  What happened with Johnny Angel tonight?  Did Bobby Flay invite you to dinner?  Big Brown’s playing time will be limited to two games each week since he is too tired to go out afterward.  Looks like Big Brown comes up Tiny Tim at the party.  The Rockaway Breakers have been playing a better brand of volleyball (Wilson or Spalding?) lately.  Robert (Rudy) McHale played the match of his life, which led the team to four victories.  Unfortunately he does not have nine lives like a cat.  League informers report that Cubby has missed three out of five parties.  An emergency intervention has been called.  It looks like the man formally known as the most interesting man in the world has turned into a troglodyte.  Bugsy says the Gray Riders have a major announcement soon.  Check Rolling Stone magazine for updates.  Robin Shapiro Realty Island played the traitors, aka Arverne Avengers.  RSRI limited the team to two victories so as not to tempt Mary, Bobby and Colleen back to the Island.  The play of the night occurred after a Denise shank.  She fell to the ground and kicked herself and had to leave the sand.  Susan came in to pinch hit and hit a homer.


The Blackwater Boarders finally put together a complete night, winning all five for the first time behind some great serving in the clutch.  Dylan Smith served some hard knuckleballs into the wind, racking up nine consecutive points on his serves, many on aces to carry the team in game two.  In game three, ignorance was bliss as Rita got to the serving line down 20-16.  Since she was told that the league doesn't keep score and we are playing for a participation trophy she had no idea that one mistake would cost the game.  She proceeded to serve out the last six points to win 22-20.   In the final game Johnny Sica got hot and ran up another string of hard serves to complete the sweep. Serge came up with some big hits, inspired by the presence of his newly married brother, Ivan, and his lovely bride, Olya, from the east.  And that’s not Far Rockaway, or Montauk for that matter; they’re from Moldova.  Check it out on MapQuest.  They might be the farthest commuting fans ever.  By the way, as oxymoronic as it sounds, there is good food in the concessions on Beach 86th, 96th and 106th streets.  Take a look see and have an Arepa sandwich or fish taco.  Then rent a surf board or stand-up board from Boarders Surf shop on the boardwalk at Beach 97th.  You can even rent a bike or paddle-tennis paddles and play right there. 


Last week the league was canvassed and some interesting team and player names were found.  (Yes, too much time on my hands.)  Some of those could be considered puns.  Therefore, here are the top ten punny names and associated teams.  The names have not been changed so as not to protect the innocent.  It is hard to believe that these are real names:  10 - Ann Chovie on 100,000 octopuses, 9 - Doug Deep on Dig This, 8 - Hugh B. Serfin on Boarders Surf Shop, 7 -  Sue D. Bum on Sullivan and Galleshaw Esq., 6 - Kerry Okie on Kerry Hills, 5- Allen Wrench on Hamilton Hardware, 4 - Charlie Horse on Sands Point Physical Therapy, 3 - Al Cohol on Bogatell Vino, 2 - Brook Lynn Organ on Brooklyn Transplants, 1 - Anita Drink on It’s 5 O'clock Somewhere.  I emailed the aforementioned ten puns to the league editor to see if any of the ten puns made him laugh.  Turns out, no pun in ten did.  Ouch!  That hurt.


Captains were required to submit SIGNED rosters by last Wednesday night.  Most of the teams came through big time but a few did not.  If you did not win any points in the standings it might be because you forfeited because your signed roster had not been handed in.  The reason we require signed rosters is so that every team plays with eligible and legitimate players each week.  No team may pull players from the sideline when they are short.  No opposing captain can approve that.  No referee can approve that.  You may think it’s fair to your two teams but it is not fair to all of the other teams that abide by the rules.  Why don’t you have a couple of spouses on your active roster who only play when you are desperate?  Oh, because they are not good volleyball players?  Well, that’s what many other teams do even though they don’t win too many games with the weaker players.  And you may want to review the league rules on the RBVL.com website.  No one is eligible to play in the RBVL unless they have turned 14 years old by opening day.


Thanks again to Bud Light who are sponsoring the RBVL this season.  They were generous with a contribution toward the uniform costs and it is nice to see the many revelers throwing back Buds and Bud Lights at the bars after the games.  Keep up the good work.  Harbor Light was a gracious host and attendance is picking up each week.  As always, if you have any questions please call Patty at 917-613-0908.  (Be sure to call between 10 AM and 9 PM.  Remember, Patty has a life outside of VB, too.)  Or just check our website at www.rbvl.com.  You'll find the answers to most of your questions there, not to mention pretty pictures and funny stories. 


See you on the beach!